Side Effects   by Woody Allen

Mid Feb. 2007     Second hand bookstore in Hamburg.

I wish to start with the explanation of where I got this book: When I was still in search of an engagement ring for Pamela, I once found myself with some free time in Hamburg -after seeing my visiting Grandfather onto the shuttle bus for the airport. So I looked about town for antique and second hand stores, and ended up at a secondhand market place, beside the train-station. They had very little in the way of jewelry, but there was a bookstore there...

And I went in to ask about old books about Ballet or Dance. (Why? Because I'm such a good, good, boy. That's why; I'm always with one eye open for books that might interest the Dance Library in Montreal. It's a wonderful collection, and I feel ever so good about myself when I can contribute to it.) So, I looked in this shop for anything that might interest the Library in Montreal, and made detailed notes on three or four books, (in German, from the 30s or 40s.)

I e-mailed the information to Montreal, and found out that there was a copy of each of these books already in the library, -except for one: That one would be of interest, and the price seemed just fine! So, I asked a friend from Hamburg to buy it for me. -And it could not be found. After a month or two, I was again in Hamburg, and when to look for myself. The ballet book couldn't be found, but we looked, and looked, and looked. -And that's when I saw this Woody Allen book. When we'd finished browsing through every shelf, I bought the Allen, and was about to leave, when I asked, "And what's in that shelf, on the floor by your desk?" -The Ballet book was found at last!

Incidentally, tucked away in the back of this book, was a little 20 page booklet, about some German modern dancer in the 1920s, two pages of text, and the rest just pictures. I asked how much THAT book would cost, or if it was included with the big book. -And the man was so surprised! He'd never known it was there. -And he let me have it for free. Very nice. It made me quite like this old antique dealer. NOW... onto the actual book that I read!!!

The sixteen (very) short stories in this book range between weird-interesting, and weird-I-Can't-make-any-sense-of-them-at-all! The best example of weird-enjoyable was the last story, (all 17 pages of it!) It's about a mediocre man who finds a fantastic love, which lasts some months, then breaks up, painfully, but with mutual respect. -And the man then ends up being together with the mother of his old lover. They get married, -and the daughter wants him back again. It's mad, it's twisted, it's very likely sort of sick. -But the way it's written is a huge laugh, and I was shaking my head in disbelief, rather than in lack of comprehension.

Another story that I thought was splendid was the Kugelmass Affair in which the married man Kugelmass is introduced to a magic cupboard, which will take him away into whatever book he wishes, there to have sexual affairs with the characters of his choice. -But his fantasy turns out to be much less ideal than he wished, and troublesome, and difficult, and for the reader, comical.

The one other I would like to mention is the second last story in the book, where a review for an Italian restaurant is written in the styles of Philosophical treaty, Socio-political work, Mathematical/Scientific paper, and (I think,) a review of a new art collection. It was screamingly funny, and I found it perfectly, Pleasingly ridiculous. The only thing I could later think to add to it, were the Theatrical Review and the Sports Commentary.

But this book wasn't all... enjoyable. There were parts which I simply couldn't see any meaning in. There would be coherent little jokes included in them, but the thing as a whole was simply nonsense. But not amusing nonsense, just... things that don't make sense.

I wonder if his writing is simply an acquired taste, and that if I went back a reread the whole thing now, much more of it would make sense to me, and be pleasing to read. I wouldn't mind seeing one of his movies now, or reading some other stories by him. I know that he can be a perfectly amusing author.